dissolve to analyze

I was blinded when I stepped out of the garage - you couldn't tell where the sky began or ended from the horizon. Everything was white and white all around: we were lost in a tunnel of softness.
Leaving home in negative degree weather. It was so cold. Saying goodbye to my sisters and brothers. Hugging my brothers in bed. Be good, be strong. My mother and my father. Waving past the security gates, it's not the first time parting, but there can still be another hug.
It feels like the days back in Korea when I'd wave self-consciously from the bus window at the two fading figures as I left for boarding school. What's that feeling -

I'm sorry I couldn't make banana bread one last time for my dad. And my mom had bought all those bananas.
I wish I could have talked more with my siblings.. bonded more while I was home.
In family dynamics, please give us peace. I don't want us to be torn apart.
I hope we stay together.

fresh forte

it's a new year and you appear again
-----

can I make it more?
leave the pettiness, the materialism, the vanity, the short-lived worldliness

can I shed all that plagues me, embedded
and take small steps
to Him?
Your open arms reach out to these tears unrestrained

I'm tired of pretending, being empty
I want to live
I want to give

to care and smile from the inside.

Here's to a New Year for all,
Here's to love :-)